Sunday, March 23, 2008

Humorous exploits

Today, I shall bestow upon ye mortals a list of "entertaining" things to do when you are: bored, catatonic, lethargic, or trapped somewhere with bloody thirsty sharks and greedy matchmaking mothers all around you (note: only one of those items applies to bleeding bachelors).

  1. Play ping pong with a 4 year old. Guaranteed entertainment. Wear a face mask for safety.
  2. Take pictures of people playing ping pong with a 4 year old. Also guaranteed fun.
  3. Look up cameras and try to figure out the difference between aperture, ISO, focal length and CCD size (?). This should only be used if you are in the mood for mindless entertainment. Otherwise you will hurt your zygomatic muscle trying to figure out why multi segment metering characteristics are so important.
  4. Go ride a Kawasaki KLR 650 dirt bike/motorcycle. 'Nuff said.
  5. Sing loud, obnoxious karoke to AC/DC's song "T.N.T". Then give an encore performance of Aerosmith's "Dream On".
  6. Scratch small dogs feet as they attempt to get some shut eye. Giggle uncontrollably when they give you the evil eye.
  7. Read Calvin and Hobbes. Then go find a stuffed animal and take it to school/work with you, and talk to it multiple times throughout the day. (this works best if you work in an office. Law office, for best effect.)
And finally,
  1. Mention the words "pusillanimous" and "stentorian" in causal conversation. (definition of pusillanimous: adjective, showing a lack of courage or determination; timid. Definition of stertorian: adjective, loud or powerful regarding a persons voice).

Well, have fun. And take some video. If you want to win the Best Comedy Video Award on YouTube, take a video of you singing AC/DC. With your stuffed animal.

I must apologize for the randomness of this post. But it made me giggle, so I thought I should share it. Bonus points to anyone that caught that "bored, lethargic, and catatonic" are synonyms and knew that "zygomatic " was secret medical speak for the muscle in your cheek.

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